Disobedience #writebravely

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

The phone rang with Niti’s smiling face displayed.  Shruti picked up the phone immediately.

‘Didi,’  she said and started sobbing.

‘Shruti, what is it?  What happened?’ asked Niti full of concern thinking of all weird things that could have gone wrong.

‘It’s its N.. Neil..  He is leaving me .. for someone else …I was never good for him.  And now he d..doesn’t even look a…at m..mee.  I should have listened to Mamma and Papa.  I am being punished for my own a..actions.  F..First the b..baby.  Now this.  My life is finished,’  she sobbed through the phone.

‘Wait… don’t cry.  I am coming over,’  Niti said and hung the phone before Shruti could say no.

Shruti wiped her tears.  She looked around the house which looked like a mess.  Plants withered, dusty shelves, cobwebs.  In a half eaten plate at the table,  she saw ants making a straight line across the table to their secret hiding place.  She did not care but with Didi coming over,  she knew she will get an earful for the unkempt house.

She wanted to get up,  put things in order.  But her body disobeyed.  She will do it before she arrives anyway.

‘Why bother when life is itself a mess,’ she thought.  She pulled the covers over her head and fell into a dreamless sleep.

The insistent doorbell woke up Shruti.   She ignored it many times.  But,  this one rang non-stop.

She got up from the bed,  staggered in the darkened living room and opened the door.  It was Niti.  She barged into the flat.

‘What is all this,  Shruti?’  Niti pulled open the curtains and bright sunlight poured into the room.

Shruti stared back at Niti through sleepy eyes.  She felt the tears brimming up trying to escape.  She walked upto Niti and hugged her.  The sobs were uncontrollable.   She repeated their phone call conversation.  Seeing her little sister cry was distressing for Niti as she cried with her.

Niti went into the kitchen to make tea.  Tea always helped after a good sob.  As they sat on the now cleared couch to sip their tea,  Shruti started to tell about Neil.

I’m taking part in the Write Tribe ProBlogger Challenge.



17 Comments Add yours

  1. Nupur says:

    We all have days when getting out of bed is an effort.


  2. I really appreciate your skilled approach. These square measure items of terribly helpful data which will be of nice use on behalf of me in future.


  3. Parul Thakur says:

    Okay, let’s hear her side of story. Lata, give us more. The suspense is great and keeping me hooked. Well done!


  4. Shilpa Garg says:

    It’s good that she has a supportive sister, but hope Niti is able to make her see some sense!


  5. I look forward to the next installment every time. Already trying to write the end in my head.:)


  6. Vinitha says:

    Shruti is too much depressed. I am wondering why her family isn’t aware of this state of hers! Good that her sister has arrived. Waiting to read what Shruti tells about Neil.


  7. writershilpa says:

    So eager to find out what Shruti tells her sis!


  8. Alice Gerard says:

    Shruti is depressed. She suffered greatly when she lost her baby and her world is falling apart. She desperately needs help. I hope that her sister can support her in her hour of need.


    1. lataadmin says:

      Bingo! Exactly. But the lack of awareness and stigma of mental illness in India inhibits treatment


  9. Its good for Shruti that she has a sister like Niti who stands by her in times of trouble. Hope things get sorted. Waiting for the next chapter.


  10. Storyteller says:

    I wish Niti put some senses in Shruti so that she can come out of her depression


  11. Rashmi says:

    oooh! bringing in the sister is cool! Love this angle of the story. Can’t wait to hear what she says about Neil!


  12. Sulekha says:

    I still feel Shruti is at fault. She is pushing Neil away because of her suspicious nature. Make her see her fault, Lata. Don’t know how the story will progress but I am excited. Great narration.


  13. Loved this sibling story .Its so difficult when one sister is troubled.


  14. Obsessivemom says:

    She seems like a troubled person. But I’ll make up my mind after I hear what she has to say about Neil. And I like the sound of her no-nonsense sister – that’s exactly what siblings are for.


    1. lataadmin says:

      Exactly.. We do need that one person in life who will look at our face and tell us the truth. Thanks Tulika.


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